Tran Thi Yen, 30, married into her husband's family from Chuong My Ward, Hanoi, in 2022. Her husband is the younger of two siblings, and his parents are farmers.

Yen still remembers her curiosity and surprise the first time she visited her future in-laws' home. On the family's 530-sqm plot stood three separate houses: one belonged to her parents-in-law, another to her uncle-in-law, and the third to her two unmarried aunts-in-law, who have lived together for many years.

The three houses share the same courtyard and entrance gate, with no fences separating them.

"I was curious and a little worried because I'd always been used to having my own private space. I wondered whether I could adapt to this kind of shared living arrangement, but I still decided to marry into the family," Yen recalled.

The first few months as a new bride were filled with unfamiliar routines and minor inconveniences. At the time, the entire extended family shared a single bathroom, while the washing area, dishwashing space and clothes-drying area were also communal. Everyone had to take turns and be considerate of one another.

Yen and her husband left for work early each morning and returned home in the evening, so they rarely crossed paths with other family members. Still, as they adjusted to living together, Yen, her mother-in-law and her two aunts-in-law occasionally struggled to understand one another.

Over time, however, they came to see each other as family. As everyone learned to accept both one another's strengths and shortcomings, life became increasingly harmonious.

"Despite a few inconveniences that come with sharing the same courtyard and entrance, I gradually discovered the wonderful things about my husband's family.

"Everyone genuinely cares for one another, so relationships between husband and wife, siblings, sisters-in-law and other relatives are uncomplicated. We always help each other. If something breaks in our house, my uncle-in-law comes over to fix it immediately. 

“My mother-in-law and aunts often share fresh vegetables and fruit they've grown. Although each household cooks separately, whenever someone makes something special, they divide it among all three homes," Yen said.

She especially cherishes memories of the extended family gathering to wrap banh chung during Lunar New Year. The year-end reunion dinner, prepared together by four generations, is both lively and heartwarming. Whenever someone falls ill, the rest of the family immediately steps in to offer care and support.

After giving birth, Yen received help not only from her parents-in-law but also from her aunts-in-law, uncle, aunt and younger cousins, who all pitched in to help care for her child.

That overwhelming sense of love and support, she said, made it easy to overcome any hesitation she once had about becoming part of such a large family.

Four generations under one roof

The year 2025 marked a major milestone for Yen and her husband when they decided to demolish their old house and build a new, more spacious one.

When the family discussed the construction, everyone agreed to let the young couple make their own decisions, as long as the design was practical and reasonable. Yen's father-in-law made only one request.

"I don't want any barriers separating our home from your uncle's and your aunts' homes. Let's keep the spacious courtyard so the whole family can continue enjoying it together."

That was exactly what the couple wanted as well. They only asked to add another entrance gate to make daily access more convenient, and the entire family supported the idea.

"We've shared the same courtyard and entrance for so many years that none of us wants to divide the property with fences," Yen said.

Throughout the construction process, the extended family provided both financial and practical support, from helping with expenses to cleaning up and supervising the builders. When the new house was completed, everyone celebrated together.

"When we moved into our new home, my two aunts moved into my parents-in-law's former house, and their old house was demolished. Now everyone has a more comfortable living space," Yen said.

Today, 13 family members live together on the 530-sqm property. The oldest is Yen's 84-year-old grandmother-in-law, while the youngest is her daughter.

Each household manages its own meals and daily routines, but on weekends, holidays and family celebrations, everyone gathers to cook and eat together.

"My grandmother-in-law has six children. Four of them now live within the same family compound. Her two daughters who married and moved away always come back for special occasions, making the gatherings especially joyful and warm," Yen said.

Thanh Minh