Delaying marriage is not merely an individual or family matter. The trend directly impacts future demographic calculations. VietNamNet spoke with Thao, lecturer at the Faculty of Social Work, Hanoi National University of Education, to gain deeper insight into how young people view marriage and family today.

While marriage and parenthood were once mandatory milestones of adulthood, young people now have more choices. They still desire a family, but hold higher expectations regarding marriage quality and parental responsibility, Thao said.

Many people think that marriage is gradually losing its appeal; in your opinion, what are the biggest barriers?

I think it is more accurate to say that marriage has not lost its value, but it has lost its status as the default path. As single life has become more viable, young people are asking whether marriage truly offers companionship, security and a better quality of life, or simply adds more responsibilities and risks.

The primary barrier is economic instability. Young people calculate not just wedding costs, but housing, employment, child-rearing expenses, and long-term financial stability. According to a United Nations Population Fund survey released in July 2026, covering over 108,000 respondents aged 18–39 across 73 countries and territories, 81 percent viewed financial security as a crucial prerequisite for cohabitation.

More importantly, achieving stability is increasingly difficult when jobs, income, and future prospects remain uncertain. Thus, they do not oppose marriage; they simply feel they lack the foundation to undertake a long-term commitment.

Additionally, work-life incompatibility presents a major hurdle. Competitive pressures and long work hours lead many to view marriage and child-rearing as added burdens.

A deeper barrier stems from gender inequality within marriage. Women enjoy expanding educational and career opportunities, yet after marriage, society often expects them to handle the bulk of housework and family care. Meanwhile, men face pressure to serve as primary breadwinners. This model places strain on both sides, causing many to deliberate carefully before entering marriage.

Furthermore, standards for marriage quality have evolved. Young people seek more than a formal status; they desire an equal, respectful relationship offering emotional safety and mutual growth.

I do not believe today's youth fear responsibility or act selfishly. They are simply managing risk - balancing what marriage provides against the responsibilities and pressures of married life.

What measures can make marriage a desirable choice, encouraging young people to marry and have children with confidence?

To make marriage more attractive, we cannot simply change young people's attitudes; we must transform the institution of marriage itself. Marriage must be built on equality, respect, safety, and mutual development, rather than one-sided sacrifice or rigid marital roles.

People often joke that buying a television or washing machine comes with an instruction manual, yet before entering marriage, many young individuals do not know how to "operate" their relationship. Pre-marital education should extend beyond reproductive health and legal formalities to equip couples with communication, conflict resolution, financial management, domestic task sharing, and the ability to identify unsafe relationships.

I also believe society must reduce pressure and stigma surrounding singles, late marriages, or divorces. A voluntary marriage holds true meaning only when individuals retain the freedom to marry or remain single.

From a policy perspective, rather than focusing only on financial incentives for childbirth, greater priority should be given to reducing the costs and risks of starting a family. This includes improving access to affordable housing, stable employment, childcare services, family-friendly workplaces and stronger gender equality.

Policies should also reflect the different circumstances of individual localities. The ultimate goal should be to support people in making their own choices, not to pressure them into getting married or having children.

Vo Thu