During four visits to Vietnam, an American father has chosen to stay with his in-laws rather than his son’s home, drawn by the warmth and lively atmosphere of a close-knit family.
Vu Thi Huong, born in 2001 and originally from Bac Giang - now part of Bac Ninh province - married Nick, an American born in 1998, in 2023. The couple currently live and work in Bac Ninh, about 21km from Huong’s parents.
Back in the US, Huong’s father-in-law, now 63, lives alone after his wife passed away, while his children work far from home. During video calls, Huong often noticed his quiet solitude, a feeling her husband also shared.
“Because of work, we have not yet been able to move to the US to live with him,” she said.
In 2024, he made his first trip to Vietnam to visit his son and daughter-in-law. During that week, he chose to stay at his in-laws’ home, even though the young couple had their own place nearby.
Arriving during the Lunar New Year, he experienced a full Vietnamese Tet - sharing warm family meals, visiting relatives and neighbours, and immersing himself in traditions.
At a farewell dinner before returning to the US, he told his in-laws: “It has been a long time since I felt this kind of family atmosphere, this sense of togetherness. I will definitely come back again.”
True to his word, he has since returned three more times, each visit lasting two to three weeks.
On every trip, he chose to live with his in-laws rather than at his son’s home. He found comfort in the quiet rhythm of rural life and grew fond of their sincerity and kindness.
After four visits, he even shared a future plan: “One day, I will sell my house and land in the US and move to Vietnam.”
Becoming part of the family
Huong with her husband and father-in-law.Huong’s parents (far left) hold their in-laws in high regard.Huong’s father and father-in-law always accompany the family on every trip.
When Huong’s parents first heard that their in-law would visit, they were delighted. A month in advance, they carefully prepared everything, from a comfortable bedroom to personal items.
“They gave him the best room in the house. They bought a hairdryer, utensils, new bedding and towels, and even prepared dishes like pasta, potatoes and steak so he could feel at home,” Huong said.
Yet, he quickly embraced Vietnamese culture and cuisine, caring less about those preparations and more about the warmth of family life.
In later visits, Huong’s parents kept things simple, focusing only on creating a relaxed and welcoming atmosphere.
During his most recent visit, over the Lunar New Year, he stayed for three weeks. Like a true family member, he joined in cleaning, decorating the house, making banh chung, preparing offerings and celebrating New Year’s Eve.
On the first days of the new year, he accompanied his in-laws to visit relatives and handed out lucky money to children. He took part in every activity as though he had always belonged.
Huong’s father-in-law is very fond of Vietnam’s Tet holiday.Huong’s father-in-law regards his in-laws as his own family.
After the holiday, daily life resumed. Each morning, the two fathers would take the grandchildren to school, have breakfast together, return home to tidy up, cook meals and rest before continuing their routines in the afternoon.
Huong was especially touched by simple moments - the two men cutting each other’s hair, chatting on the porch, cooking and taking care of the house. Despite relying on translation tools and gestures, there seemed to be no real barrier between them.
She realised that when people genuinely care about one another, language differences become insignificant.
On one visit, her 92-year-old grandmother gave him a large bag of peanut candy, knowing he liked it. He was deeply moved by the gesture.
Another time, he got lost during a walk and was guided home by a local resident. He later said he admired how Vietnamese people look after and help one another.
Each time he visits, he brings thoughtful gifts for every family member - supplements for the elderly, toys for the children.
Occasionally, he also takes the entire extended family on trips, covering all expenses as a way of expressing gratitude for their hospitality.
At the end of February, when he returned to the US, the whole family gathered at the airport to see him off. There were tears on both sides as they parted, reluctant to say goodbye.
Huong still recalls her husband’s words: “Thanks to marrying you, not only did I gain a wife, but my father gained a family as well.”
Vietnamnet.vn
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