A long journey for love

True love came to Phung Thi Thu Trang (born 1990, from Phu Tho, now living in Hanoi) when she least expected it. In 2017, she was a single mother of a one-year-old daughter, burdened by debt after a failed business venture.

In the middle of life’s hardships, she met an Indian man 16 years older than her. His warmth and sincerity helped her navigate one of the most turbulent phases of her life. That man was Rajneesh Singh (born 1974), an IT engineer.

Back then, Trang was looking to improve her English, so she joined an app to connect with foreigners. She “swiped” and matched with Rajneesh.

Initially, they only chatted about work. Trang admitted she was hesitant to message him, as she had a fear of Indian men. But everything changed when she happened to mention her daughter, Sam. Rajneesh, fond of children, immediately expressed a desire to protect and care for the little girl.

“He said he could sense my positive energy. Despite my struggles, I didn’t complain. He said that’s what he admired in women,” Trang shared.

After a month of online conversations, Rajneesh flew more than 3,000 kilometers to Vietnam to meet Trang and her daughter. From the very first meeting, she sensed his kindness and sincerity. The gentle way he spoke to and treated baby Sam deeply moved her.

Rajneesh stayed in Vietnam for nearly ten days. Before leaving, he told Trang, “I want to adopt Sam. Even if things don’t work out between us, I still want to raise her.” His words gave Trang a sense of peace.

A marriage across cultures

The couple maintained a long-distance relationship for two years. Every two months, Rajneesh would fly to Vietnam to see Trang. When work got in the way, they would each fly halfway and meet at the transit airport in Thailand.

During their time apart, they messaged and called each other daily. Rajneesh patiently waited for Trang to improve her English so they could communicate more deeply. “I went from using translation tools to being able to argue with him in English now,” Trang joked.

Rajneesh’s background was also marked by hardship. He lost his mother at 13, and years later, his father passed away from cancer. He only has two older sisters - one in India and one settled in the US.

By the time he met Trang in his 40s, Rajneesh was mature enough to make his own decisions about happiness. At first, Trang’s family was concerned about cultural and religious differences, but his humble, respectful, and affectionate nature eventually won them over.

In 2019, Rajneesh proposed. They held an intimate party to introduce both families and celebrate their commitment.

A year later, Trang gave birth to their second daughter, further strengthening the bond between them.

“After getting married, we lived in Vietnam for two years, then moved to India for one year. Since March 2023, I’ve returned to live in Vietnam permanently, so he travels back and forth,” Trang said.

“When we’re together, we cherish our time. When we’re apart, we check in with each other through texts and calls. We’re both independently happy people who live positively and have our own hobbies, so being apart isn’t too hard,” she added.

For the past six years, their marriage has been an enriching fusion of two cultures. Rajneesh enjoys Indian food but limits it to four times a month to suit his wife’s preferences. Trang prefers Vietnamese cuisine but still cooks a variety of dishes to please her husband and children.

“In our daily life, I’ve learned to respect, and he’s learned to be flexible. I adapted to the Indian tradition of eating with hands, and he learned to use chopsticks. He mastered chopsticks in just 26 days and really enjoys Vietnamese food,” Trang said.

“During Indian festivals, I join him in the rituals, and he hasn’t missed a single Vietnamese Tet holiday in six years,” she added.

Eating with one’s right hand was the most surprising cultural experience for Trang when she became a daughter-in-law in India. She admitted the first time felt awkward and unfamiliar, but as Rajneesh explained the cultural and spiritual significance, she gradually came to appreciate it.

“Indians believe that the right hand absorbs the energy of the food. After a few meals eaten by hand, I began to feel a deeper connection - not just to the food, but to the earth and to the soul,” she said.

“Now and then, I eat with my hands alongside my husband as a sign of respect and to preserve his cultural identity.”

In raising their children, the couple combines Indian discipline with Vietnamese warmth. Rajneesh, she said, is a devoted and meticulous father. He firmly told Trang never to differentiate between stepchild and biological child. To him, both daughters are his blood and his world.

“Being his wife has taught me patience and gratitude. Over the years, I’ve lived more slowly and more meaningfully. I’ve realized that language and cultural differences are not scary in marriage. As long as both people turn toward each other, everything can be harmonized,” Trang reflected.

Thanh Minh